PiP’s latest look at kitchen and bathroom products demonstrates their qualities in action with precocious children, talking tulips and clients that want a bit more
EluPura S540 wall hung toilet
Hansgrohe
‘But Mummy, why can’t I clean my teeth in the toilet? It’s got a dirt-repellent glaze and no rim, so I can’t catch germs from it! And it only uses 4.5 litres of water per flush, which is less than I use when I leave the tap running! And if I use the little button it only uses 3.1 litres! I can use the little button and we’d save lots of money!
‘And Daddy was crying last night about bills again, wasn’t he Mummy? So Daddy would be pleased, wouldn’t he?’
‘Alright. Go on then.’
Essentials Bright Olive splashback
AluSplash
When the Hoods traded their Nottinghamshire treehouse for this Streatham terrace, Marion wanted to retain a leafy aesthetic. All work was done by gold trader husband Robin, so it was important to find a material that was quick to install, and that lent itself to easy bending and cutouts.
‘AluSplash was the perfect material’, says Marion. ‘The recycled aluminium-based substrate has a fire resistant core, and both sharing an arborial background, obviously we were really wary of fire. It’s shatterproof and easy to wipe over, too – which is great for when Robin brings friends home.’
The Statement Kitchen
Nordiska Kök
Psst! Over here! On the windowsill! Yes, we’re gone-over Dutch tulips, what of it? We can still have an opinion. This kitchen is meant to be minimalist! They call it their ‘Scandinavian Statement kitchen’! Well! Its made in their actual Swedish workshops and it’s well blimmin’ fancy! Where’s the Gustavian paintwork? The oiled timber? It’s all handmade bespoke cabinetry with stainless steel countertops and book-matched, Deco-stepped, Arabescato Corchia dark-grained marble! Alabaster lamps! Honestly! Hiding your appliances don’t make it minimalist, matey! If this is minimalist, we’re a jug of buds!
HIMACS Modular bathroom
LX Hausys
Hey Briony She/Her, I’m attaching a picture of the original. The AI has done a great job on the 3D printing, it’s got the visually seamless modular integration, and the white looks have come off sick, but the client is raging. It’s great, everybody loves it, but they said they want ‘more than a (expletive) design’.
They want it in non-porous, durable, easy-clean thermoformed HIMACS as specified. Bit awkward: we forgot to prompt for HIMACS so it’s only gone and done it in gypsum; so less ‘solid surface’ and more ‘dissolving surface.’