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Get in, go out, or just look on with the latest doors and windows

Claire Leavey

Visiting is coming back on the agenda, so the right doors, windows and the ironmongery to operate them are more critical than ever. There’s lots of choice on PiP’s specified pages

Frameless glass door systems

Arrive location 0543 hours and observe. 0900h contact unlocks and enters. Lose eyeball. Contact returns to counter with coffee and Danish. Remain in observation to ascertain no tail then enter premises. Contact does not return call sign so I state admiration for frameless sliding door systems. Intergalactic portal is in centre of shop floor. Contact distracted, I step onto transfer plate and activate remote control. Portal open smoothly but time-travel function does not engage. Contact agitated; uses telephone. Police and mental health services arrive 1103 hours. Mission aborted.

Ali Vu aluminium casement windows
Senior Architectural Systems

Normally the building would have interested Ginger immensely. Its unweathered walls indicated modernity; but he and Biggles had time-travelled to the 21st century, and Lister Gardens looked familiar. ‘By James!’ Biggles remarked. ‘Do not trust its Streamline Moderne styling! It appears to be an energy-efficient shared-ownership residential edifice, with windows in aircraft aluminium, double and triple glazed! The slim profile frame accepts glazing up to 44mm thick, and – yes! advanced coatings technology! We’re in the future, Ginger! There is no mistaking it!’ 

Bespoke continuous rooflights

Arboriculturalists are flocking to Maidenhead to study BRL Architects’ revolutionary group of Amentium Monstrosum var. Braywickia at the Braywick Leisure Centre. Velux has crafted a continuous barrel-vault rooflight to protect and display these remarkable trees. Braywickia’s afoliate square, barkless trunk, and ‘boomerang’ double-rooted habit, has here produced a natural colonnade of arcs, with the Velux lantern’s diffused polycarbonate providing essential sunlight and minimising glare so the scientists thronging below can properly study these ‘engineered’ trees.

Centre pivot thermal glazing windows
If that Tracey Emin had made her bed occasionally she could have had it all. She could have stayed here in Margate, admiring the sea views through the Keylite roof windows, all safe and cosy in a nice modern house with built-in wardrobes and everything – but oh no, she had to go off and be all disgusting in public and hang around with that Billy oik from Chatham. She just threw it all away doing amateur embroidery in a tent, didn’t she? She could even have held down a proper job if she tried!

ARES Auto venting rooflight
IQ Glass

At Brobdingnag, I first was put into a small drawer, this placed upon a shelf for fear of the rats. By day, I was placed upon a table in the largest room of the inn, until a school-boy aimed a hazelnut directly at my head, whereupon my master, seeing how profitable I was likely to be, resolved to install me in a secure box-like cottage, whose auto-rising ARES roof light was large and secure and he did charge the people of the town one penny a squint and the nuts did bounce right off it.

Legacy Conservation rooflight

Here at Handforth Parish Council, we know the proper procedures. First, all comments should be addressed to the Chair. The Clerk is the Lord of All Things, and must not be defied. The Ancient Parish Hall is a Sanctum whose purity shall not be breached, especially by County Council fixers sent to interfere in Sacred Council Business. Above are the Rafters of Righteousness from which all such Agents of Evil shall be dangled. We’ve installed these rather lovely slender-framed aluminium rooflights to properly illuminate their mortal shame – and provide escape for Jackie Weaver.

Neo-08 OR S8 Rooflight
The Rooflight Company

OK lads, here’s the job. Gnasher, you get some fencing chains against that plasterwork. Dave, here’s a rag: lamp-black round the drawer pulls. And Lee? Where’s bloody Lee? Lee! You bugger. Get the big hammer on a few of them tiles.
Yeah, me and you Col, we’ll get up the tower with the jemmy and mess them super-flush rooflights up a bit. They’re immaculate! Get some green and black round the edges and that. Can’t believe how they left this place. It’s a garden room! Where’s all the rubbish rattan and junk??

SMARTec redwood doorsets
Assa Abloy

‘Well, the 26-child socially distanced lunchtime grid is forming up, here at a newly remodelled Silverstone Primary. I see the Williams twins, Alan Thrust and Martin Trundle sitting there, and Nikesh Mansul is just pulling up to his mark. And now… you can almost feel the tension rising. The instruction has been given to clear the grid, the finger guards are securely in place, the P600 cylinders are turning in their chambers… The redwood frames and dark grey PVC edges of the Assa Abloy scuff-resistant doors are almost showing… They’re swinging open – and we’re away!’


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